Unlock More Joy: Simple Steps to a Happier Life

Introduction

While sitting at my laptop and going through my long task list, I could feel the energy draining from me and my mood lowering. Then I got a notification from Substack. Dr Julie Fratantoni had posted

“You’re not stressed because you’re doing too much. You’re stressed because you’re doing too little of what makes you feel alive.”

This immediately resonated with me. Have you ever felt really tired and then you do an activity you really enjoy and suddenly your battery is fully charged, and you feel like you can take on the world. You then realise that you have been working hard, prioritising everyone else’s needs, and making sure everyone else is happy but not prioritising your own need for joy. 

Balance vs Harmony

The word balance is a word I do not like. It conjures up images of me in a leotard, on a tight rope between two 100 story buildings while juggling on a unicycle. But it’s fine because I am balanced! I prefer the word harmony. I would like all the areas of my life to be in harmony.

This implies that there will be times when family, work or any other area of my life may take a bigger percentage of my time, but everything is still in harmony.

There is an understanding from all the people around me that my family is a priority right now or there is an understanding from my family that an important work project may need more of my time for a while. 

Why is joy and happiness important?

In a 2017 article in The Harvard Gazette titled “Good genes are nice, but joy is better” the results of the Harvard Study of Adult Development was discussed. This study tracked 268 Harvard Sophomores from 1938 for almost 80 years and later included women and the men’s children (who are now in their 60s). One of the findings was that the happier you are, you longer you can live. Having healthy and happy close relationships also has a positive effect on your health.

A better predictor of whether people would be happy at the age of 80 was if they were happy and content with their close relationships at the age of 50. Therefore, being happy and ensuring joyful activities are part of our daily lives doesn’t just improve our mood and wellbeing for that moment but can have significant positive effects on our health decades later. 

How do I create joy in my life?

Creating more joyful moments is something that can easily be done when you become more intentional about it. You can use the below steps as a guide.

1. Reflect on Joyful Moments

Go back through your calendar, journal or dairy of the previous 12 months and write down all the moments, memories and events that created joy for you. These can be big or small. It is surprising how easy it is to forget all the jovial moments we have had. Human beings naturally remember the negative experiences due to the primitive reptilian part of our brain which has the sole purpose of protecting us from danger. 

2. List Joy-Boosting Activities

Now write a list of all the things you enjoy doing or would like to do that would fill you with joy. Again, this can be small or big. It could be watching a movie with your partner at home with some tasty snacks. It could also be reading a book on the beach or going to the theatre. It could be sitting on the sofa with a cup of tea and just chilling. Anything at all. 

3. Review Your List

After reviewing both lists, see how many joyful or fun moments you have got planned for the next 12 months in your calendar?

4. Plan for Joy

Do you have a lot planned and feel excited about the future? Or do you have next to nothing planned and feel fed up and uninspired? If it is the latter then go back to your lists from steps 1 and 2 and start looking for events and planning some joy time into your calendar. 

My Personal Joy List

I did this a couple of years ago and it changed everything. However, I can still have moments, like mentioned at the beginning of this blog, when I have less joyful events than I would like. Once I become mindful of this I rectify it immediately by going back through my own list and booking in some Joy time. Some of the things on my joy list are:

• Coffee with close friends
• Cinema
• Going to the gym
• Watching TV
• Sitting in the garden with a cup of tea
• Having a bubble bath with bath crystals, oils, candles and soothing music
• Going to the theatre
• Family movie night with popcorn
• Going to a nature park with the dog and my family
• Having a 30-minute power nap!
• Going on a trip (can be a staycation or abroad)

Let’s Connect

Let me know what is on your joy list and how you have incorporated more joy and happiness into your routine by contacting me by email or through my social media pages. If you would like help with feelings of overwhelm or feeling that your life is more joyless than Joyful, then book a discovery call and I can help you add more joy into your life. 

THANK YOU

Thank you for taking the time to read our article. Recognising the importance of your health is a powerful first step, and we’re here to support you with reliable information.

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Disclaimer: Our blogs are for informational purposes only and do not replace professional medical advice. Please consult your doctor for personalised guidance